Member-only story
When it is hard not to say yes
I was recently attending a dinner with my workmates when it happened. We were enjoying the fanciest meal in the fanciest restaurant that you can imagine. While I was busy filling my plate and my stomach, my colleague decided to try out a new buffet area that was exclusively reserved for gourmet cheese and other tiny things stuffed in wraps. Everything was going well until my colleague suggested that I try the sushi. And I blurted out almost impulsively that I do not like the taste of it. I still wonder why I felt the need to make up something that didn’t ever happen.
Why I said what I said is beyond me. I did not consider myself as someone who gives in to social pressure. My reaction surprised me. And it got me thinking.
Then it occurred to me that I was only trying to “fit in”. Deep down, I was not ready to admit that my knowledge and indulgence in luxury food is limited.
This deep-rooted desire to be liked and accepted in a society where nobody cares what the other person does can be quite overwhelming. I did not realize until that day that the shame of not “fitting in” in the peer group can take a serious toll on one’s self-esteem. Who knew it was going to poke holes in the very identity that you built over the years.
I pondered over all the times when I fell into this trap. My brain immediately led me to this…
